One of the various things I read online these days is Ask Polly, an advice column. Advice columns frequently amuse me, and I go through phases of reading them and not - mostly depending on the balance of how many of them recently have amused me vs. have disturbed or upset me. Just yesterday, though, was this one:
http://nymag.com/thecut/2015/02/ask-polly-how-do-i-stop-hating-myself.html
It's one I identify with. There are any number of differences, of course, but the core of his problem - self-acceptance - is my biggest battle and frequently the biggest problem of kinky people. It's not really too hard to understand why, either; after all, accepting one's being divorced or accepting one's being a vegetarian is easy - your friends, your family, your coworkers will all support you. Being kinky is sortof like being gay in this respect; some people people will love and support you anyway, some people will turn against you because of it, and some people - maybe most people - are happier never knowing. There's nothing wrong with being kinky, and yet it's hard to convince yourself of that when the world around you tries hard to convince you otherwise.
It could be worse; most of us can pass as norms. Many of us come across as eccentric or weird, but we can get by in everyday life. That's not true of all of us - some of us are stuck between being miserable and denying ourselves, or being excluded and even arrested. Some of us need help to avoid being a statistic - and a depressing statistic at that.
There are resources out there, and one of the most useful is the Kink-Aware Professional's Directory. It's not perfect and it's not complete, but it's a good starting point - and sometimes, the people on that list are the difference between freedom and jail time... Or life and death.
Even if you aren't kinky, remember how much the kinky people in your life need your support, your love, and - above all else - your acceptance.
No comments:
Post a Comment